Essay Time

There comes a point in everybody’s lives where they just wish that they could forward time. Jump ahead a few steps. I have just reached that point.

An English essay is waiting to be done and as always I would love to fast-forward a few days and hold the finished words in my hands. Or instead of me moving forward it would be much less hassle if my older self would just hand me my finished work. It wouldn’t be cheating. It would be self-help? Self-plagiarism?

Are those even words? Clearly I am simply looking for an excuse not to start this dreaded essay and this blog is serving as a hide out for my inner procrastinator. If I were a few yawns lazier, I could even fool myself into believing that writing about an essay that I don’t want to do counts towards planning and preparation… does it?

Maybe if I explain the task I am legally bound to tackle, I can get my fingers warmed up and eager to allow the juices of my creativity to flow freely onto the page. However, not too creative as the restraints of an essay do not permit for much… expression despite the “art” involved in writing the perfect essay.

The day has come when even a teenager must be politically correct in their school work. The question asks us to study two different recordings and transcripts of teenage conversation and comment on the way teenagers adapt their spoken language depending on the situation. It would be easy enough if it were not that the teenagers speak in heavy Liverpudlian (Liverpool) accents. It would not be a surprise if the Scousers score the highest marks but in the interest of political correctness… what accent?

Has anyone ever heard of communal essay writing? It is a newly formed (as of now) method in which fellow bloggers work communally to produce complete essays. It is a new initiative that aims to help alleviate some of the load off busy English students, allowing them more free time to waste. Anyone interested?

If you’re not gullible and didn’t believe a word of that, encouraging messages are equally welcome. Cheer me on as I open up a new word document and begin what will hopefully be the best essay I have ever written. With your support, this essay will be the – dinner time!

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